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As I wrote in my previous post, marriage has fallen on hard times in Japan. My completely unscientific explanation is that men and women here don't have the same expectations for marriage. Japanese women seem to want partnership, romance and communication (as seen in American movies). And it would appear Japanese men have been brought up to think romantic-type communication is unnecessary. Thus, the problem. But as you can see from the photo in the ad above, Japanese would-be grandmothers aren't giving up so easily. Probably, the prospect of their adult children never leaving home is strong motivation to step in and give a gentle push. So, a new industry of marriage counseling agencies has sprung up to aid them. They see job hunting as a good pattern to follow when tracking down that perfect mate. They encourage prospective spouses to build their skills, fix up their appearance and improve their conversation-making ability. Mostly, they need to follow the rule of telemarketing...you gotta make a lot of calls before someone finally says yes.
I believe that since America is largely the cause of this gap in expectations, we should also be part of the solution. Our ideal of marriage is quite good though difficult to maintain. Therefore, Americans don't so much have a hard time getting married as they do staying married (note: I should know). But I digress.
Why not help Japanese men build their communication skills and their marriage resume? All you English schools in Japan and America, why not offer some Marriage 101 classes that help men learn to communicate their feelings, make their wives feel special, and do all the other touchy-feely things women all over the world like? My father and brothers could teach these classes if you need help (can't wait to hear from my sisters-in-law). You could boost your enrollment and be part of turning around the plunge in population! After all, your schools won't last long if there are no more students. Think about it. Then, let us help you get the word out to these poor guys. Their mothers will thank you... www.noah-digital.co.jp/english/
As another Mother's Day comes and goes, I am reminded that if more women don't start choosing to be mothers, the future of Mother's Day isn't very bright in Japan! Of course, it's hard to be a mother in Japan. For example, there are almost no clothes dryers or dish washers. That can really put a damper on having a big family. Also, in Japan women sleep with their children until they are in elementary school or so which not only makes me tired just to think about, but also would seem to make having other children a "challenge." Another cultural obstacle is that there is NO BABYSITTING in this country and no such thing as mom and dad having a date and leaving the kids at home. In addition, husbands often work until late at night and leave all the child-raising, household duties and financial decisions to the wife. (American women, you don't know how good you have it.)
But I would have to say the biggest obstacle to having children these days is that many young people just don't have a healthy interest in getting married anymore. I recently read that 60% of unmarried young men and nearly 50% of women of the same age weren't dating. I think male/female relationships are just too difficult, as Japanese women and Japanese men don't seem to be from the same country. The women here have been very influenced by foreign travel/study, foreign movies and foreign men. They want deep communication, intimate relationships and help around the house like they think Western women are getting (not cowgirls, but women living in the Western hemisphere). On the other hand, as one Japanese man told me, he was brought up to believe that his wife and other close relatives should understand how he feels without having to be told. So he and most other Japanese men never tell their wives/girlfriends, "I love you." Sounds romantic.
Well, there is a marketing idea in all of this un-marital drama but this post is too long, so I will write about it next time. 'Til then remember, men, your wife can't read your mind and neither can your potential customers. Here at Kondo Communications Factory, we build better communications...in Japanese www.noah-digital.co.jp/english/.
The most common greeting in Japan, "Ogenki desuka?" is literally translated, "Are you healthy?" I'm used to it now, but when I first came here, I was surprised by the overriding focus on staying healthy. On the other hand, I think Americans are focused on being happy. Similarly, I think Japanese are concerned with length of life, while Americans are more concerned with quality of life. Part of the quality Americans strive for is a life with as few doctor visits as possible. "An apple a day keeps the doctor AWAY," right?
Conversely, everyone here is constantly going to the doctor and it seems the more medical tests the better. One that is especially popular is the "stomach camera." The doctor threads it down the patient's throat to have a look around. This is like a piece of cake to the people here (though harder to swallow). Japanese will get an I.V. like we would take an aspirin, and I'm not kidding. I've literally run away from a nurse here trying to stick an I.V. needle in me because I had a bad cold. Another time, I told the doctor I had a sinus infection and soon met a cousin of the stomach camera, the throat camera. My friend laughed while the doctor stuck a camera up my nose down to my throat as a single tear ran down my cheek. After that and an X-ray, the doctor pronounced that I had a sinus infection. Not only are doctor's offices very popular and full of people, but hospital rooms here also accommodate 6 to 8 patients at a time so that you are never lonely.
I would say Japan beats America in the health industry in that they outlive us, and who can argue with that? But America is and has long been more concerned with mental/emotional health than Japan has until very recently. I know a Japanese mom who has ordered products and sought advice from American websites for her slightly autistic child and felt that her child was helped very much. While she had lived abroad and was a good English speaker, what about all those children whose moms can't read English? Come on...get help from us, or get help somewhere....www.noah-digital.co.jp/english/
I have written before about how young Japanese people look. Today, I will tell you one of their secrets. Can you guess from the photo of my good friend above? (By the way, this photo was not staged. It's several years old.) My Japanese friends say this horror of the sun is a fairly recently phenomenon and certainly contributes to maintaining youthful Japanese skin. It has also spawned a plethora of sun-resisting fashions. You will often see women wearing long white gloves even while driving just in case some rays are reaching them. Recently, the face visor has gotten popular, especially for women riding bicycles. As my Japanese friend said, "It looks like Darth Vader is coming toward you." One fashion for which I am very grateful is the scuba-diving-type bathing suit. All of us moms who take our children to the swimming pool get to cover up every inch of our aging bodies while at the same time being on the cutting edge of fashion.
While perhaps Japanese are going to the extreme these days to avoid the sun, this has certainly always been a hat-wearing culture. Little children must wear hats to school, for example. Also, something that isn't recent is the obsession here with having white skin. Many of the skin care products promise to "whiten" your face. In Japan, the whiter and paler the better. On the other hand, Americans see pale as sickly and a nice tan as healthy. My sister loves to make fun of my lily-white legs in photos, but honestly, it's a relief not having to worry about getting a good tan every year. Instead, I can just be myself and look anemic.
So, where is the marketing opportunity in all this? Well, for any hat-marketers out there, I know America is a tough market for hats. I won't wear one even though it's totally in fashion here. There is just something in me that doesn't like a hat. But here you will find a very different market. What about cowboy hats, for example? They work on the range and in the desert. Certainly, they can ward off the sun here and help keep everyone looking young. Let us help you round up some customers...www.noah-digital.co.jp/english
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